Tuesday, February 22, 2011

50: Keep Your Balls Outside

If I had a quarter for every time I had to yell at the boys to stop playing with their balls in the house, I could buy a regulation size soccer field. Or, I could pay for therapy to deal with this problem:

The session might go a little bit like this:

Therapist: I see that you've listed on your patient questionnaire that your reason for seeking counselling is "intimacy issues." Are you having trouble maintaining relationships with the opposite sex?

First Born Son:  No. I am having issues of intimacy with myself.

Therapist: Oh. Where do you think that might originate from?

First Born Son: I think it stems from the fact that my mother commanded that we were never to play with our balls (or sticks, for that matter) in the house.

And this, ladies and gentlemen, is my 50th post.


  1. Congrats on the 50th! My son doesn't have any balls - is that a problem??

  2. Thanks. And, I am forwarding your question to Dr. Oz- as it seems like the type of question he could dedicate an hour long show to. Or maybe I need to contact ESPN or one of those sports centered networks (I am sports illiterate). Balls are so confusing.

    Max (First Born Son)read your comment over my shoulder (there is no such thing as privacy in this house!) and laughed out loud.

  3. woo-hoo! 50 ain't nothing. congrats girlie. talk about balls to the wall.

  4. 50! congrats - love it...can't wait till Kit finds his balls!