Friday, January 3, 2014

yes, before you know it...

My last goal for 2013 was to keep my eyes open until midnight. Accomplished- but barely. We were all knit together on the couch- the kids, the dogs. Us.  We counted down from ten, the ball dropped and Princess Commando gave me a celebratory squeeze. It’s not that it was a bad year, it was just good to let go of 2013. 2014 feels more than ever like a year for embracing the opportunity for opportunities.

A few days before Christmas, a large envelope arrived in the mail for First Born Son from Buffalo State College (his first choice and my Alma mater).  I don’t know what I expected it to be- but, I did not expect it to be the affirmation of 17 years of planning, guidance, accomplishment. 

I unfolded the glossy tri-fold and pulled out the letter tucked neatly inside the pocket:

Dear Max,
On behalf of our faculty, staff and students, I congratulate you on your admission to the Pre-Business Administration program at Buffalo State College…

Hot damn! It's a Major Award! Happy Christmas to us!

This is one of those moments seasoned parents caution new, googly-eyed parents about.  Before you know it, he’ll be in college. Yes, before you know it....

When we were beginners standing at the starting line of long and winding path dotted with milestone markers, we sighed at the sprawling stretch of time billowing ahead-confident that there would, in fact, be time ahead of us. Through the bliss and through the battles, we developed a recurrent verse- We just have to get him to college. We imagined what the world would look like- what type of person our son would be- who we would be in the context of it all. I imagined myself to feel much wiser when the acceptance letters landed in our mailbox. But now that we have arrived at Before you know it, he’ll be in college, I don't feel all that more enlightened.  

There are three others for whom in times of achievement and times of agony, we mumble- We've just got to get them to college. I'm still contemplating the rise and fall in the path ahead but with less confidence that time will, in fact, keep surging onward-forever-for us. The difference now is that I now have the authority to exhale sentiments which will drift carelessly about the tender heads of new mothers- ‘Relish these moments.Take it all in and don’t blink. These moments will be gone before you know it.’ 

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