10

Her birthday card. Because she loves hamsters.

Today is a big day.
Today my little
Blackberry,
Poopernutter,
Lovey Dovey,
Chickabiddy,
Princess Commando
enters into the double digits.
10
Soon I will blink
and she will be
driving ME
to Target.
But for now
she still
can jump up
into my arms
and I can still
carry her.
I think,
though,
I will always
be able to
carry her
even if
by the power of
some magic
hidden genes
she grows
to tower over me.

This is what it is like to take a walk with a two year old (and a tricycle)

this is why I'm tired.

Princess Commado left her hamster, Pepper, in our room.

At 2:00 AM, we wake to the disconcerting sound of rodent teeth gnawing on metal. My brain is thick with sleep and I think Pepper is trying to escape; but she is only drinking from the metal arm of her water bottle. I am too foggy and heavy to get up and bring her back into Princess Commando's room- so I resolve to put up with the noises- the gnawing and the exercise wheel spinning. I have dreams of  hamsters darting across the bed.

Then, in the still cloaked hours of the morning- a thunderstorm. It would have remained a rumble in my periphery if that little voice wasn't calling  from the other room. It speaks with an animated clarity which my sleep fuddled brain interprets as a frantic call. I involuntarily bolt  upright to respond.

"Hey, guys! Ya hear that lightning! Ya see those big lights?" It repeats again and again- louder and clearer each time.

Her little eyes are wide and sparkling- igniting with each lightning flash and thunderous punctuation. She isn't scared. She is thrilled. "Hear that lightning, Mama?"

"Thunder makes the sound, Baby. Lightning makes the flash. Are you scared?"

"No!" She answers quickly. But, then she ruminates. She knows there is an opportunity nestled in my question. It could lead to her favorite place in the world, Mommy and Daddy's bed. She twists her face in mock fright. "Oh, yes. I'm very scared. I sleep in Mommy's bed."

I scoop her up and curl around her under our covers thinking there are still a few more hours left to rest.

The hours are there- but not for rest.

Each achromatic flash enlivens her more. She shakes the sleep out of me with a recurrent question: Ya hear that lightning?

Then the thunder thins and the sky is dark again- morning is slowly creeping toward the first alarm. Her breath becomes heavy, followed soon by toddler snores. Finally, hopefully-forty minutes of rest.

But, no! It can't be! Another rumble. An industrial belch. An iron groan. Garbage trucks. Men's voices calling back and forth. Big eyes pop open on a little head. "Ha!" She exhales abruptly as if she hadn't ever fallen into a snoring slumber a minute earlier. "What's that?! Garbage trucks? Garbage trucks! I love garbage trucks! Do you like garbage trucks?"

Not today. 

swampy brain

For weeks my mind was like this:

running, running, running. I had a creative explosion. It felt good. It felt like I had direction. An example of my direction- illustrations for a picture book that I've been holding onto for three years. I had the words- which were alright- but it wasn't until the pictures came into focus that I knew where I wanted to go with it.

But, then the temperature started to rise and stick around 90 something degrees with air that felt like breathing through a dry sponge. My fibromyalgia started to flare up so that each joint felt as if someone was turning screws. I was a wooden door swelling against its hinges and frame. When it gets like that, the pain embogs me and renders me bootless. At its worst, which was this past weekend, I laid down in front of a box fan which sputtered out the only air circulating in our living room. Eww, I was crabby and stuck. I wanted to shoot something.

 And my brain got all swampy, slimy, gross. 

I challenged The Baby to a whine off. I won.

Today weather has loosened its oppressive hold. Slowly the screws in my joints and muscles are loosening. The doors aren't sticking. Hopefully, opportunity will be knocking on them soon, and I will be able to walk right through. 

Please enjoy 20% off of Annie's Beach Rocks and your entire order at Lulu.com. Click here to be taken to Lulu's homepage. You'll find a savings code on the homepage which you can enter at checkout to receive your 20% discount. The offer ends, August 10, 2012.

Annie's Beach Rocks follows a little girl, her Daddy and her brother on an excursion to the beach to collect rocks. While she is there, Annie learns about the many ways people use rocks in everyday life. She uses all that she learns about rocks to create a special gift for Daddy at home. Available in soft cover, eBook, and through the iBookstore:

fish are jumpin

Sometimes I get a song stuck in my head and the only way to get rid of it is to draw it out.

What bad parents letting their baby wander off toward the water. Good thing her Daddy is Ninja fast.